I’m always game for trying something new and I like to get a bargain. This week I had two big decisions to make: 1) which vibrator to buy? and 2) am I worth it?

To give you a bit of context: I’m not usually a big fan of vibrators. I do like dildos. But I generally prefer the rest of my sex toys to be physically part of the person I’m with – fingers, tongues… you get the picture. (And yes, that holds true for when I’m on my own too.)

But there I was ringing on the bell as the store manager of Sh! in Portobello was opening up shop. I wanted a vibrator and I wanted it now!

Of course there are lots to choose from. So I quizzed the lady in pink about customer favourites, multiple functions, rechargeable or battery-reliant? She gave me lots of information and then invited me to touch and turn on the display items. Get a feel for them, as it were.

One thing struck me immediately: a whole table of the things just didn’t appeal. A whole shelf range did. Many of them I simply didn’t find attractive. This hadn’t occurred to me before but, as I duly pressed all the buttons and felt up the various toys, I quickly realised that the decision-making was going to be based on which vibrator I fancied the most. And I mean ‘fancied’ as in the way I would fancy a person I wanted to have a relationship with – not a one night stand.

Because, you see, vibrators aren’t cheap. Well, some are, but they look cheap, feel cheap, and I wouldn’t want them anywhere near my precious ladygarden. So this was to be an investment piece. I don’t want a whole drawer full of vibrators, I want one that I can love and cherish.  I don’t want some clunking mechanical thing, I want something sleek and sexy. And I don’t want it in pink or wearing rabbit ears, I want something I find erotic and sensual.

I’m not going to tell you which one I bought (it’s gorgeous!), or how much I spent (I’m worth it!). But I will offer a suggestion: when it comes to matters of your wonderful sexual self, don’t scrimp. Treat yourself to the best you can afford. Gift yourself something you desire. And then, enjoy.